Beauty is a matter of taste

Women will create a million reasons why it’s not us personally that men don’t (want to) approach. I’m with too many friends/not enough friends. Friends that are too old/too young or too hippie/too square. Sometimes, when I’m really insecure OR feeling very confident, I will tell myself that it is because I am too attractive and men feel they are out of my league. Another variation of that materialized when a guy friend broke the man code by telling me that some men strategize by not picking out the best looking woman in the group - they pay attention to the more mediocore friend who perhaps might not be as used to it. (I ignore the possibilty that may be the case in an instance when I am on the receiving end.) Sometimes it’s because I’m not dressed appropriately, bad hair day, no lipstick, frumpy clothes. Or maybe they heard me in conversation and felt intimidated by my aggressiveness or put off by my conversation. Maybe I just didn’t bring my A game that day/night.

I consider myself to be a fairly attractive person. Not the skinniest, anymore, but tall enough to pull it off. But I’m also old enough to realize that there will always be someone skinnier, prettier, smarter, taller, leggier, more European, whatever one’s personal fancy is. It’s the whole package that sells. But without a good first impression, you rarely get a chance to show anyone the rest of the ad.